I plan to get married soon, my fiancé has two children, 18 and 21. Tragically their father died 17 years ago I love them as my own and they have expressed an interest in taking my name. Since they are both legally adults, do I adopt them or is there another procedure? Is any of this even possible?
There is a major difference between actually adopting an individual and simply allowing a name change. With an adoption the child receives all legal rights of a biological child, including the right of support and maintenance and the right to inherit.
Changing a child’s names doe not confer upon the child these legal rights. Certainly you can choose to include these children and treat them as your own; but should the marriage not survive, or you become estranged from the children no legal obligation attaches.
With an adoption, if the marriage does not survive, your are still considered the legal parent, which means an obligation to pay child support until the age of 21, provide medical (including up to age 26 if possible), providing post-secondary education and assisting with special expenses.
Now that also includes the right of Custody & Visitation, so if you become attached to the child, you can continue to have access. With a name change, if the biological parent leaves, there may not be any further access to the children.
A name change may cost less money than actually completing an adoption. Both involve Court permission. An adoption would require a home study, and a name change merely requires consent of the biological parent and the child if over age 14. Also keep in mind that if the children are female the issue of a name change may be mute, if they marry, they will probably choose to take their husband’s name.
One other item you may wish to consider. Since the children have lost a biological parent they may be receiving social security death benefits. These continue until the child reaches the age of 18. Once the child is adopted, their legal parent is no longer deceased, which means they may no longer be able to receive the death benefit.
As always this is a general answer to a general question. Each legal issue may contain other facts that need to be discussed with your own attorney.
If you have a question for Attorney Kukuvka, please mail them to her at 330 E Main Street, Palmyra, NY 14522 or e-mail to cklaw@verizon.net,